Slab Slayer

QUESTION

Who would win? A haunted concrete slab, or 65 30mm depleted uranium rounds traveling at 1,010 m/s?

ANSWER

It's the depleted uranium rounds. The depleted uranium rounds would win. It doesn't matter if the slab has magic powers or not; You don't just "walk off" getting hit by a one-second burst from a GAU-8 Avenger. 

Story:

Your city is under attack from a seemingly endless army of haunted slabs and they want to bring destruction to everything around them. Armed with cartoonish weapons, anti-tank landmines, and the entire 74th Fighter Squadron from Moody AFB, you must stop the living slabs or die trying.

Weapons:

• Landmine - The ban on landmines doesn't say anything about Anti-Tank landmines, I think? Doesn't matter though, because you have landmines and you probably know how to use them.
• Piano - Military officials are big fans of cartoons, so now you can take on your adversaries with piano dropping sponsored by the US Army! It's like private SNAFU but funnier.
• Airstrike - Obliterate your enemies by harnessing the raw power of the A-10C and its legendary GAU-8 cannon; A gun developed by the same people that made your washing machine!